Ranking Of The 9 Best Rides At Six Flags Great Adventure
* I would like to discuss my credentials for making this ranking. I’ve been a Six Flags season pass holder since I was about 7 years old so that’s basically 14 years of knowledge of “More Flags. More Fun.” Also, at one point in my life I wanted to be Mrs. Six (Mr. Six’s wife- you know that crazy old dancing man in the commercials that made everyone uncomfortable because you were concerned his blood sugar might be way too low to be doing those cartwheels).
9) BATMAN: The Ride.
This ride is making its way to its 21st birthday this season. Which means it’s making its way to retirement in roller-coaster years. Can I get a HALLELUJAH for that?! Sure we have some loops and some corkscrews but it’s basically just a shitty version of Bizarro. LOL at the newbs who wasted a FLASH Pass on this one.
8) Green Lantern.
Well talk about the biggest letdown of 2011. I was so amped when I heard that Six Flags was getting a STAND UP roller-coaster like THAT’S WILD. I even made sure I got my Season Pass early that year so I could “preview” it a weekend before it officially opened to the public. Maybe I expected too much from a Six Flags that was basically bankrupt. This shit is painful as hell. I mean it’s steel and it’s new and I still got the biggest headache ever- like it takes effort to build a ride THIS bumpy. Those civil engineers could be such slackers.
7) SUPERMAN: Ultimate Flight.
Okay props for being super cool in that you are literally like flying in this laying down flat position you are put in for the ride. Anyways… that’s about the only cool thing about this ride. First, the line is always weirdly, epically, unnaturally long. Like why?! This ride is like a second long and sure we have a pretzel loop but not too much is going on. Second, this crap breaks down EVERY TIME I go when I’m usually the next person to go on so anger is at an all time high. It’s 90 degrees outside, I haven’t eaten in 4 hours and I can’t even get on this crappy ass ride. I don’t even want to go on but then what have I been waiting on line for 2 and half hours for. Yup not too many positive memories associated with this one.
6) THE DARK KNIGHT Coaster.
For some reason I am a huge fan of this ride. Lots will disagree with me. But come-on, those quick 90 degree turns and those unexpected mini drops in the dark!? And of course that AIR CONDITIONING because it’s indoors. I have zero complaints.
5) Bizarro.
Quick shout out to the people who actually walk all the way to the back of the park for this one- you guys are true amusement parkers. For all you Six Flags alumni, you know this is an updated and improved Medusa. It’s a floor-less ride which is always kind of cool (when you aren’t wearing sandals- then it sucks). It has its corkscrews, loops, hammerhead turns and the list goes on. But mostly, the special effects are on point. Gotta love that quick flame.. what a fab touch!
4) Dare Devil Dive.
This is called, I think, a “sky coaster” but I can totally be lying right now. Basically it’s like bungee jumping mixed with a little bit of skydiving. It’s weird but it works! Love this ride because every time it still gets my heart racing which is impressive because I’m basically immune to getting scared on any rides at this point in my life. Reason it isn’t higher up on the list is the extra cost. If the $12 Cold Stone I just bought by Nitro didn’t make my wallet hate me already, this is the icing on the cake.
3) Kingda Ka.
Okay so it’s the tallest and fastest roller-coaster in North America (used be in the world but that was a short-lived 5 year title). 128 mph and about 91 Mishes high (456 ft)?! I’m all about it. Personally think the 270 degree twist drop down isn’t the most thrilling part. The whole going from 0 to 128 mph in 3.5 seconds is what really makes you say that quick pray for your life before the ride starts. Wish it weren’t just a drop and there was a little more to the ride but I won’t be a diva with all my demands… but come on, ride’s not even a minute long…
2) Nitro.
CLASSIC. CLASSIC. CLASSIC. LOVE. LOVE. LOVE. JUST STARTING OFF WITH THAT TENSION AND ANXIETY WHEN SLOWING GOING UP THE HILL BEFORE YOU HIT THAT 215 FT DROP. PERFECTION. Ugh, I just can’t.
1) El Toro.
My life changed in 2006 when this ride opened. First thoughts, “It’s wooden. How bad can it be?”. Man did I get my ass handed to me. That first 76 degree drop at 176 ft starts it all off right. After that there is no stopping. Drop after drop, quick turn after quick turn- you literally get no breaks and it’s hands down the best ride at Six Flags.
SIDE NOTE: So apparently the new drop ride coming this season Zumanjaro Drop of Doom is suppose to be some cray cray shit. 415 ft high (tallest in the world) and 90 mph. Like it’s going to make Hollywood Tower of Terror look like a bitch. Keep an eye out.
And Now A Moment Of Silence For These Lost Thrills…
R.I.P Batman & Robin: The Chiller (1998-2007)
* NOTE: This was honestly one of my favorites. Summer 2007 was a dark time for me at Six Flags.
R.I.P Medusa (1999-2008)
R.I.P Great American Scream Machine (1989-2010)
R.I.P Rolling Thunder (1979-2013)
* NOTE: #finally
* Tis the months when an absurd amount of “I HEART NY” shirts are sold.
Life Of A Mish 