9 Reasons Why The Summer NYC Tourists Are Terrible
* Tis the months when an absurd amount of “I HEART NY” shirts are sold.
** These basically apply to any season (spring, fall, winter) tourist to be honest.
1) Two Words: Times Square.
If Broadway from 42nd to 47th Street wasn’t crowded enough who doesn’t loved being pushed and shoved by an extra amount of sweaty, unreasonably happy tourists. DOES NO ONE KNOW THERE IS MORE TO NYC THAN MIDTOWN!??!??!?!?
2) They stop in the middle of the street to take a picture.
Listen people I PROMISE the Empire State Building is not going anywhere and you can quickly move to the SIDE of the street to take your picture and it will STILL be there! It’s amazing I know- plus you won’t cause a traffic jam.. win win!
3) They can’t walk faster than a snail’s pace.
Welcome to New York where our “walk” is your jog. We stop for no one and are ALWAYS in a rush so let’s hustle kids.
4) The death toll is about to rise with these Citi Bike’s.
Calling all tourists. If you don’t know how to ride a bike-don’t ride one here. Also, if you do know how to ride a bike-don’t ride one here. Taxis, other bikers, people, pigeons, etc are all hazards for you tourist bikers so don’t even risk it. Friendly reminder: bike lanes are for BIKERS. They will run you over and it WILL be your fault.
5) Constantly being disturbed for subway directions.
It’s called HopStop.
6) They travel in packs.
Thank you for COMPLETELY blocking the entrance into the MET because I totally don’t mind waiting as your tour group of 8 BILLION MILLION get their tickets.
7) They ask you repeatedly to say “coffee” because of your “New Yawk accent”.
It’s coffee with an “o”. I see no “a” so we’re right. Now let me get my Starbucks and go on with my life.
8) They want a “Star Map” like we’re in Hollywood or something.
Unlike LA we leave our celebs alone in NYC (well minus me-I’ve gotten better. Sorry Nick Jonas.) but anyway you should not stalk someone’s apartment building and we won’t help you with that. Plus they all left for the Hamptons so you’re out of luck.
9) They complain how they wish they lived in New York.
They must have missed our winter weather report this year.
Life Of A Mish 